Thursday, January 26, 2012

:: demystifying daycare, a plea ::



i had some helpers with me this week since the babysitter was sick (only emily is pictured here, but evan helped too) and it made me remember that i have a question that i'd like to ask everyone. everyone anywhere. i would like about 1000 comments on this post because i'm interested in ALL of the options. 

in the box, out of the box, near the box. this is an invitation for brainstorming.

my kids are in an awesome in-home daycare. but for a list of reasons that is important but not really right for delving into here on the blog, things are going to have to change with the daycare situation and because this change will more or less coincide with evan heading off to kindergarten in the fall,  I NEED TO KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT.

how do you make half-day kindergarten + a younger sibling not yet old enough for pre-school (emily misses the cut-off by days and won't be able to go to preschool until she's a teenager, or so it seems) + a growing self-owned business that requires regular if not 100% full-time daycare?

i mean, on the one hand a nanny seems like the way to go, so evan can come home after school and i can be at work and emily can be taken care of all the while.

but we've tried the nanny situation before and maybe it's just us or something but nannies get sick a lot and then i get mad because inevitably they get sick when brian has court or some such trivial thing and so i have to be the one to ditch work and figure out how to still get the stuff done and have fun with the kids and not resent anyone or anything.

plus i like the idea of them being around other kids because again, maybe it's just me but i find that running a business and being home part time with the kids is not the recipe for tons of playdates. i think we probably end up with like fifteen playdates a year.

but i'm not even sure i have a grasp on what our other options are. here's my list. please add to it in the comments and feel free to (please do!) share your thoughts on making it all work.

OPTIONS:
  1. a school-like daycare where the kids are separated into classrooms by age or whatever. this would separate emily and evan.
  2. another in-home daycare, but i think this would need to be near home because of the aforementioned kindergarten thing, right? in other words, it would be best located in our school district or else i'd be leaving work in the middle of the day to chauffeur evan, right?
  3. a nanny.
  4. a shared nanny, like shared with another family or something, so that there could be more kids hanging out and being friends? maybe this is something i invented in my own wishful head.
  5. latchkey for evan and something separate for emily. to the very best of my recollection i literally did not know kids with two working parents as an elementary school child, and so to me latchkey was this foreign place in the gym and the cafeteria where the weird kids went (i'm just being honest about my 8 year old prejudices here, folks) and maybe there they did weird things or maybe weird things were done to them? but maybe it's different now? or maybe it was always different? discuss.
  6. something different altogether?
daycare mystifies me, my friends. clearly i need your help.



Comments (6)

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Hey Julie,

So I have not the most experience with this, being a college student and all, but my little sisters go to Sunshine daycare over on Oakview, which is option 1. They seem pretty flexible there, and do have the kids separated into classrooms. They handle kindergarten by putting the kindergarteners all together in a room, but you can get WICSD to bus there (that's how Amanda gets there after her full day of first grade). My sisters really enjoy it, and my interactions with the teachers have always been good.

Also, regarding latchkey... I went to latchkey in fifth and sixth grade and loved it, partly because of the fantastic head of the program. My little brother also tried going at some point and absolutely hated it, mostly because of the people running it. In other words, it can be a great program, but it really depends on the people running it. My family has had mixed experiences with the YMCA programs.

I wish I could come home and nanny for you for a while! That would be way cool :)
I think every option could work if the person(s) responsible for your children is right. What I would do is check what is logistically doable and then go with your gut feeling of the place and the people. Having other kids around can be great but only if the adults around are great too. By the way, here in the Netherlands option 4 is quite common.

I hope this was helpful (maybe not). I have had so many sleepless nights on the same issue :)
I'm on the other side of the world too... Australia.. I work three days a week and my two girls go to a daycare that has 6 rooms based on ages, but if my older one (4) wants to play with the little one (1), and the staff numbers etc are all OK she can go and play on the little kids side. And if one or the other is upset for some reason they will get their sister to come play for a bit if needed. So while they aren't together they aren't all that far away either.
While we have had our ups and downs with them there they often tell me that they don't want to home yet.
You will probably find one that instinctually feels right to you—my preference is for school-like daycare but here in nyc it is stab-me-in-the-eye expensive and even we may need to find another solution. I know many people doing the shared nanny thing and they're thrilled with it, but I've only seen it with one kid per couple...

I'd give number two a good thinking, because that's even something I'm hoping for!
tough one for sure.... nanny's that "get sick" seem a little "flaky" to me. I did have friends that nanny shared when the kids were babies in Baltimore... I think you could keep a nanny for Em, who also is trusted and can drive to get Ev for the afternoon (is he going to be bussed?). Ev is too little to have to be at school longer than he needs to. Both my parents worked, I had my own babysitter who was there when my sibs came home (on the bus)....that's all i have to say for now.... ;)
i know of an option in brighton for a center with both full day daycare and wrap around care for evan, (he would get bussed there after school and stay for the afternoon) but that's driving for you. Is there something like this in irondiq? i have a friend near you who might know other options in your area if you want me to put you in contact. good luck!!

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