Thursday, November 15, 2007

:: Buck You, Ohio ::

Being a New Yorker living in Ohio is like what being the only gay man in a rabidly straight locker room must be like: everyone around you has pictures of women up and all they want to do is talk about women and oh my fucking god people stop asking me if I am going to watch the game this weekend.

No, I don't want to donate blood to help OSU beat Michigan in the Blood Donating contest that apparently OSU won last year and still has the trophy for.

No, sorority chick on the quad, I don't really care what website you want me to go to to "help us beat Michigan."

No, I don't have anything scarlet to wear. I've lived here almost five years and the only Buckeye gear I have is my student ID and a super big sweatshirt my hubby got me at the spur of the moment when I was eight months pregnant and cold. now. cold now. brr. must have giant sweatshirt.

I asked my students once, and only once, what the big deal is about this game. Someone told me, "It's a battle between good and evil." She was not smiling. She was serious.

And now I miss home.


Christina November 15, 2007 at 7:07 PM  

You do get used to it eventually. It's not as bad outside of Columbus, but we are a college football town.

I don't really follow football all that much, however, I do know the basics of how the Buckeyes are doing. (They've lost one game, I think.) It's practically required. My big secret - I don't own any OSU clothing. Don't tell anyone, OK? ;)

Just be thankful you don't live anywhere near campus. And I'd avoid that entire area on Saturday. Even with it being an away game, you still don't want to be near that mess.

Maria November 16, 2007 at 8:32 AM  

So your title really makes me laugh because my younger older brothers (21 and 19, I'm 23) taught our baby brother (2) how to say fuck you, but Elijah couldn't say his Fs and so said Buck. All the time. We broke him of that by teaching him to say Go Bucks. So living in "Buckeye Country" is good for something.
I have some good Buckeyes related baby stories if you're ever interested. They're pretty hilarious.

I don't really like football, but I love OSU football. It's really weird. My husband is obsessed so that has rubbed off on me. We were watching the Arizona and Oregon game last night, and I suddenly thought to myself, "why do I care about this, and furthermore, why am I watching this?" and then I said it outloud. And a room full of guys told me that if Arizona wins, Oregon drops out of the top ten and we still have a chance at the National Title. Oh. Ok. And so I watched and cheered on a team and they won.
I think part of the sweet part about OSU football is that it is our culture. Watching the game, it's all about "we" and "us": did we just score?, etc. Small talk here is centered around weather and the Game. It's easy to get swept up in the excitement when you're watching the game with your friends.

I think more than all of those reasons, I like OSU football because it gives me the chance to act like a jackass and scream at the TV. Real life doesn't permit me to do that much.

Julie November 16, 2007 at 3:33 PM  

Hmm. Yes. Even after it's been explained to me I still don't get it. Where I'm from, I don't think we love anything the way Ohioans love Ohio State Football. Maybe Canada. We might love Canada that much.

Toni November 18, 2007 at 3:37 PM  

People are that way here in OK too. I have never understood it... and I'm a native!

Veronica Mitchell November 29, 2007 at 5:21 AM  

I live in a different Ohio city, and I couldn't care less about football.

But once, when I lived in Alabama, my classmates were discussing the Alabama-Auburn game, and I said, "I don't understand. Why does it matter?"

It was like I had defecated on the table.

So I understand.